Separation Anxiety in Cats: Recognizing and Managing It

Can Cats Really Have Separation Anxiety?

Yes – while cats have a reputation for being solitary, they can form deep attachments to their humans. Separation anxietyin cats is basically a fear or distress caused by being separated from their preferred person or people. It’s been documented that some cats show similar signs to dogs with separation anxiety.

Some factors that might predispose a cat to separation issues include:

• Being orphaned or weaned too early.
• Having a very close one-on-one relationship with a person and not much socialization otherwise (e.g., single owner household, owner home all the time and then suddenly not).
• Major changes in routine or environment (owner’s schedule change, moving, etc.).
• It’s noted that indoor-only cats in single-person households might be more prone, and interestingly, some studies suggest female cats may be diagnosed more often – possibly because they’re more likely to be very attached? Regardless of sex, any cat can potentially have it.

Recognizing the Signs of Separation Anxiety

Cats can be subtle, but here are common signs:

• Inappropriate Urination/Defecation: One of the top complaints. A cat with separation anxiety might pee on the owner’s bed or clothes specifically. It’s thought to be because they’re mixing their scent with yours as a coping mechanism. If you find pee on your bed consistently when you’re out, anxiety could be a cause (after ruling out medical issues like a UTI).
• Excessive Vocalization: Loud, ongoing meowing or crying, especially right after you leave. Some cats howl or yowl when alone (you might hear it as you lock the door). Or neighbors tell you your cat howls when you’re gone. If your cat is very quiet when you’re home but you hear them crying as you step outside, that’s a red flag.
• Destructive Behavior: Scratching blinds, tearing up papers, knocking stuff off shelves while you’re gone – more than the usual “cat got the zoomies” activity. Males might do this more, but any stressed cat might cause damage in panic.
• Over-grooming: Some anxious cats will lick or chew themselves bald (often on belly or legs). Female cats are noted to do this more for anxiety. If medical causes are ruled out, stress could be a factor.
• Hyper Attachment: Velcro cat behavior – follows you constantly, is in your lap 24/7 if possible, gets distressed if shut out of a room. Some cats anticipate your departure – they see cues like you putting on shoes or picking up keys and get anxious (hiding, meowing, even peeing).
• Eating Too Fast or Not At All: Some anxious cats might binge eat when alone as a coping mechanism, or conversely, not touch food until you return (so if you notice food bowl is untouched during an 8-hour workday but they eat when you’re home, that could be a sign).
• Excessive greetings: Over-the-top excitement when you get home – more than the usual “Hi, I’m glad you’re back.” Every cat is happy to see you, but an anxious cat might be almost frantic, and the behaviors (peeing, meowing, etc.) stop as soon as you’re back.

Important: Rule out medical issues first. A cat peeing outside the box could have a UTI or kidney issue – see a vet. Excessive meowing might be medical (like hyperthyroidism in older cats). Overgrooming could be allergies or skin parasites. Always make sure there isn’t a health reason for these behaviors.

If the vet gives a clean bill of health, and the behaviors tend to happen specifically when the cat is alone or separated from you, separation anxiety is likely.

Why Do Some Cats Develop Separation Anxiety?

It’s not fully understood, but possible reasons:

• Early separation from mom/litter: Kittens orphaned or weaned too early may become overly attached to a human caregiver as a surrogate.
• Sudden changes in routine: Cats thrive on consistency. If you suddenly start working long hours or there’s a new baby and you spend less time with kitty, they can get anxious.
• Single pet households: A cat who doesn’t have other animal companions and relies solely on human interaction might be more at risk (though multi-cat households aren’t immune; they might not comfort each other if they don’t get along).
• Personality: Some cats are naturally more insecure or high-strung. It’s not something you caused, it’s just their temperament.
• Past Trauma: A cat rehomed multiple times or who experienced abandonment might cling very tightly once they have a stable home.

Managing and Soothing Separation Anxiety

The goal is to make your cat feel secure when alone and teach them that your absence is not a catastrophe. Here are strategies:

1. Enrich the Environment:
   A bored cat is an anxious cat. Give them things to do when you’re gone:

• Toys: Puzzle feeders with treats or kibble can keep them busy (e.g., a ball they roll to get food out). Novel toys that only come out when you leave can distract them.
• Cat TV: There are videos made for cats (birds, fish, etc). If your cat likes screen watching, you can leave one on.
• Window Perches: A comfy window seat with a view of nature (squirrels, birds) can be great entertainment. If real wildlife isn’t around, even a bird feeder outside the window can attract “TV” for them.
• Background noise: Some cats feel comforted by gentle music or even the sound of people talking (radio or podcast on low volume) so the house isn’t dead silent.
• Interactive time before departure: Tire them out with a good play session before you leave for work. A cat that just had a rousing 15-minute feather wand chase and then ate breakfast will likely groom and go nap, using up a chunk of the alone time in contented sleep (same principle as with cats doing “zoomies” at night – play then feed to simulate hunt-eat-sleep).
• Work for Food: Instead of a bowl, hide small portions of their dry food around the house (in little bowls or snuffle mats). Cats naturally hunt, so making them “forage” can occupy time. Just make sure they find enough to not go hungry; you might show them the hiding spots at first.
• Safe Spaces: Ensure they have a hideaway or two – like a cozy igloo bed or a box with blankets – where they feel secure. Some anxious cats do better in a smaller “den” space when stressed.

1. No Huge Farewells or Hellos:
   When leaving and returning, keep it low-key. If you make a big fuss (“Bye sweetie! Mom will miss you!! hugs”), you might actually cue your cat that something big and sad is happening. Same with coming home – if you overly smother them the second you walk in, it can reinforce that being apart was a big deal. Instead:

• Departures: Go through your routine calmly. Perhaps give a treat or toss a few kibbles for them to chase as you head out (this distracts and gives a positive association). Then just leave without a lot of fanfare.
• Returns: When you come home, if your cat is frantic, greet them calmly but get settled first (take off coat, etc) before giving extended attention. Wait until they are a bit calmer to have your cuddle time. This way, your arrival isn’t the only highlight of their day – it’s normal.

1. Desensitize “Leaving Cues”:
   Cats notice the ritual clues that you’re about to leave (like picking up keys, putting on shoes, grabbing purse). If those always immediately precede you leaving, they can trigger anxiety on their own. Work to break the association:

• Jingle your keys randomly when you’re not going anywhere, then set them down and don’t leave.
• Put your shoes on, then go watch TV instead of heading out.
• Grab your coat then sit back down at the computer.
• Basically, mix up the pattern. Do these things at times you’re staying home, so the cat doesn’t always equate keys = alone for hours.
• This may seem odd, but over many repetitions, it can reduce the cat’s panic when they hear or see those cues, because sometimes you don’t leave after all.

1. Encourage Independence:
   While it’s sweet to cuddle your cat 24/7, for an overly attached cat you actually want to teach them it’s okay to not be glued to you.

• If your cat follows you everywhere, practice doing small things behind a closed door. For example, go to the bathroom and close the door for a few minutes even if the cat meows – teach them that being apart for 2 minutes is safe and you come right back.
• Use positive reinforcement when they’re calm and alone. If you find your cat sitting quietly by themselves (maybe on a perch), quietly go over and give a treat or soft praise. You’re telling them “good job relaxing on your own.”
• Set up a comfy bed a little distance from where you sit and encourage them to use it (treats or catnip there) so they’re not always on your lap.

1. Pheromones and Calming Aids:
   As mentioned earlier, plug-in pheromone diffusers like Feliway might help create a sense of calm in the environment. They mimic the feline facial pheromone that says “this is a safe, familiar place.” Many owners report their cats seem more chilled out with these. There are also calming collars (infused with pheromones) or sprays you can use on bedding. Additionally, supplements like L-theanine (e.g., Anxitane), Zylkene (a milk protein derivative), or Bach Rescue Remedy might take the edge off. These are often available OTC and can be tried after consulting with your vet for appropriate use.
2. Maintain a Predictable Routine:
   Try to feed and play at roughly the same times daily. If your schedule is predictable, the cat can anticipate when you’ll be gone and when you’ll be back. Cats take comfort in routine. If you can’t have a consistent schedule (shift work, etc.), then at least establish some consistent cues (like turning on a particular lamp when you leave and off when you return, etc., sort of environmental signals of your pattern). A trick: Some people leave a worn t-shirt or blanket with their scent on it for the cat. Your smell can be soothing in your absence. (Just ensure it’s something you’re okay getting hair on or possibly peed on if that’s an issue.)
3. Quality Time When You’re Home:
   Make sure when you are around, you give your cat some undivided attention (play, grooming, petting – whatever they like). If their “attachment tank” is full, they might handle the separation better. That said, don’t reinforce clinginess by giving attention every single time they demand it; try to reward calm behavior instead.
4. Practice Short Absences:
   Train your cat by starting with very short departures and gradually extend them. For example, step outside your door for 1 minute, then come back (before they freak out). Next time 5 minutes, then 10, etc. They learn that you do come back each time, building trust that absence is temporary. If you only ever leave for full workdays and never small trips, the cat doesn’t get to learn that sometimes you pop out and return quickly. So mix in short errands or even just a walk around the block.

In Severe Cases: Professional Help

If despite your efforts your cat is still extremely distressed, talk to your vet. They might rule out any health problems again and could suggest anti-anxiety medication for your cat. Short-term meds or a longer-term prescription can significantly help severe anxiety. The goal is to use meds as a tool alongside behavioral changes – sometimes just for a period to get them over the hump, then you can taper off, under vet guidance.

A veterinary behaviorist or certified cat behavior consultant can also help customize a plan. They deal with these issues often and might have specific insights for your cat’s situation.

Patience and Compassion

It can be challenging to deal with a cat who vocalizes or pees due to anxiety – it may even strain your patience. But remember, the cat isn’t doing it out of spite or malice; they are genuinely stressed and seeking relief or trying to cope. Punishing or scolding an anxious cat will only heighten their anxiety and confuse them (they’ll be anxious about you being upset on top of being alone – double whammy).

Instead, empathize and try to create a supportive environment. With time, many cats improve. It may be incremental – maybe fewer accidents, or less intense crying. Celebrate those small victories.

Also, consider if getting another pet is advisable or not. Sometimes people think getting a second cat will help an anxious cat not feel lonely. In some cases it does – if the cats bond, they can keep each other company. But in other cases, it introduces more stress (if they don’t get along). That’s a big decision and each cat’s personality matters. If your cat generally likes other cats and has lived with one before, a friend might help. If they’re very territorial, it could backfire.

For most cats, the combination of environmental enrichment, routine, and gradual behavior modification yields improvement. You might always have a “Velcro cat” to some extent, but as long as they’re not in a state of panic when you’re away, you’ve succeeded.

In conclusion, yes – cats can get separation anxiety, but with understanding and effort, you can help your feline friend feel more secure when they’re flying solo at home. Then you’ll both be a lot happier – you won’t have messes or sad meows to worry about, and your cat can nap and play the day away in peace, knowing that you’ll be back.

Sources: PetMD on managing separation anxiety with enrichment and routine; ASPCA & veterinary guidelines noting signs like inappropriate urination, vocalization, and the importance of consistency and gradually adjusting alone time.